How to support a child who has undergone bulling. Councils of a famous psychologist.
Parents should always remember that their children need their understanding and attention, and sometimes protection. After all, it happens that a child is being persecuted at school by their classmates, but parents do not even know about it. Most often, this is due to the complex relationship between the teenager and the parents. And also due to the fact that many parents blame their children for everything, show mistrust towards them. Therefore, a teenager does not share his problems with them.
How to support the child who has undergone bulling?
Parents should be interested in the life of their child, but you can not be too intrusive. From our article you will learn what actions to help the child survive the persecution, and what words can aggravate what is happening.
– Avoid expressions and words that may exacerbate the conflict.
Many parents unfairly blame their children with the words: “You yourself are guilty of what happened,” “If you are humiliated, it means you have something for that,” “Your appearance and behavior provoke classmates to conflicts,” etc. With these words the frail psyche of the teenager is undermined. Parents can not say such words, because their child is not to blame.
Even if he has strong differences from peers, expressed in appearance or in character, no one has the right to make him bully. And if the parent says such words, he finds an excuse for the actions of the offenders, takes their side by betraying his child.
“No need to pay attention to them,” is another expression that cannot be said to a child. It must be remembered that bullying is a gross invasion of a person’s personal space and one should not disregard such actions. In a child receiving daily humiliation, self-esteem is suppressed, dropping to almost zero.
“Do not be patient, but give them all surrender,” such advice is very risky, because it can aggravate the situation and physical violence will occur. Often offenders act as a group, and the child will not be able to resist them skillfully. Then humiliation and ridicule will become intolerable and will only intensify.
“Leave me alone from my child, otherwise I will arrange for you,” such words will not stop the offenders, but make their actions even more arrogant. They will believe in their strength and weakness of your child.
– What parents do.
* In such a situation, it is better to contact a psychologist for advice. And this should be done immediately, as soon as you understand that the child is being bullied. You can use the advice of a school psychologist or telephone helpline.
* Parents need to look at their child at home to understand their position, he is a leader or an outsider in order to be ready for possible events. If a teenager doesn’t find contact with peers badly and is not confident in himself, then it is worthwhile to select a suitable sport or hobby for him to increase his self-esteem.
The child should know that parents love him and support him anyway.
* According to psychologists, leaving school is not always the right decision. After all, no one guarantees that in another school the child will not have new torturers.
* If a similar situation happened to your child, then you should remove the beatings and contact the law enforcement authorities. Knock on all doors to protect your child and prevent further abuse.
You can help the solid actions of parents, teachers and students, the entire school and district management.